Since last Thursday, I have been at the 2nd half of a Gestalt workshop in Cape Cod.  During the first week last May, we worked with couples, this week we are focusing on families and groups. We are being taught in an intriguing methodology for facilitating change in stuck relationships. Mostly we are learning to become aware of the patterns of behavior in any closed system. In other words, if we are aware of the operating patterns, we can get a good idea of what works and what doesn’t. And, if we observe and state what is strong, we can also get a good idea of what is weaker and less-developed.

So, if you’ve followed me so far and we try to apply this concept to money behaviors, you could see if you are strong at spending, you are probably weaker at saving. Makes sense; pretty easy to understand. And, from there it’s pretty easy to see how developing saving behavior would balance the system and help solve some money issues.

But what if the strong behavior is saving, what then? Why would you even consider balancing the system by working on spending behaviors? That just seems absurd—help them spend more? But, what about a family where one person saves at the expense of other family members’ needs and wants? Or, what if someone saves at all costs because they fear never having enough?  Can you see where balancing the system with flexible spending habits might help other family members as well as help the individual sleep at night?

So money problems aren’t always about not having enough or spending too much.  Money problems are also about relaxing around money.  It’s all about awareness and balance.  And, that’s why I say, The Problem With Money?  It’s Not About the Money!

I think that’s the key, don’t you?

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