My son John’s friend, author Rob Kiser read this at his wedding this weekend. It says it all…
John, since I’ve been ripping off your material for more than a decade, it should come as no surprise that my opening line was a shameless act of plagiarism. I stole it from my favorite author, who lifted it from his favorite uncle, Alex, who was fond of invoking the phrase in his everyday life. Uncle Alex’s primary grievance with humanity was that people never seemed to notice when they were happy. So when Uncle Alex was sitting in the shade, enjoying a glass of lemonade on a warm summer’s day, he would turn to his companion and pose the rhetorical question. He found it to be a good way to unofficially keep score, and I have to admit, so do I.
“If this isn’t nice, what is?”
It seems as good a phrase as any to invoke on a wedding day, because so much of marriage, as with life, is routine. As much of a treasure as a good marriage can be, desirable jewelry is rarely hiding underneath misplaced laundry, and surprise parties will not always be waiting on the other end of every asinine errand you’ve been dragged into. The majority of your lives will be spent, and defined by, simply going about your ordinary routine. You wake up, you drink your coffee, you go to work, you sneak in a lunch of the usual, you come home, you go to bed, and repeat the process. In this life, days like today, surrounded by your loved ones, where the primary focus is that which you hold most dear in the world, are the exception. And on occasions like this, it’s worth repeating,
“If this isn’t nice, what is?”
The fog of the everyday can dull the senses in ways that would make a fifth of Wild Irish Rose blush. We’re all guilty of taking the things that are consistently there, that sustain us, that make the life we’re living worthwhile, for granted as we go about our daily routine. So often, that routine is about pursuing the things we don’t yet have, and so rarely focused on the people that we do. Chances are, a good portion of your days look an awful lot like the ones that you spent before that fateful Christmas party at Kevin and Celina’s, except for one key difference: now you get to start and finish them together. As time goes by, I think you’ll find yourselves in a happier marriage if you make acknowledging that gift an essential part your daily routine. For instance, when you’re lying in bed watching TV and the strange creature beside you adds his own otherworldly soundtrack to the proceedings, or something else has thrown your wife into a fit of laughter that sends tears down her cheeks, you can pause for a moment to ask yourselves,
“If this isn’t nice, what is?”
And surely there will be times when things aren’t so nice. There will be times when the only words out of Megan’s mouth seem to be “What,” and there will be times when John’s magnificent peacock feathers become overgrown and unkempt. In those times, I hope that the two of you remember today. A day spent with family and friends, a day to acknowledge the people that you’ve become, a day to recognize the happiness that you’ve brought to all of our lives, a day to celebrate this choice that you’re making with joy in our hearts. I hope you remember all of the people who are here for you now, who will be there for you always, because our worlds are better places because you two have found, and chosen, one another.
“If this isn’t nice, what is?”
Written and Read by Rob Kiser, Author, Stretch the Cornfield.